Thread: Am I bad?
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Old Oct 06, 2006, 01:25 AM
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Rapunzel Rapunzel is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2003
Location: noplace
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Thanks Mandy. It sounds like we have quite a bit in common. You went through and addressed my questions pretty thoroughly, which is really what I needed someone to do.

I have one sister who has dark hair and darker skin than the rest of us. She just turned out that way. My husband is the only one of his siblings who ended up with dark hair too. I guess it can go either way. I think that both of them have mostly been envied for having what nobody else in the family got. Nobody can control their genetic inheritance, but it does feel like it is less acceptable for European-Americans to celebrate their heritage. As a kid, I wanted to be Chinese. I even took a semester of Mandarin, and hung around with the Oriental kids. But I wasn't accepted very well. A guy I liked (who was Taiwanese) didn't like to be seen with me because I was white. When we went someplace together he avoided visability as much as possible.

So many people have faught for freedom of religion. Those who believe something strongly get beaten down by whichever group is mainstream in that time or place and don't like the status quo being challenged.

I grew up in cities and with few pets. I always wanted animals though. And I've always liked making things myself. These days there are only two reasons for making things yourself. One is if the experience means something to you, and the other is in order to have a quality that can't be mass-produced, or something that is unique and can't be found on store shelves. Some people have made comparisons between the things that I make myself (thinking of fiber arts now - spinning, knitting, weaving, etc.) and commercial versions. They seem to think that "It's almost like store-bought" is a compliment, but it's not really. I use higher quality materials and put a lot more time and effort into it than most of what is in the store. My goal is not to reproduce what can be mass-produced. So there's another one. I don't even want to be like everyone else. Sometimes I feel bad for not wanting to fit in, but still wanting to be accepted. Some people respect some of what I do, and I appreciate that. I don't want to be mainstream, so I guess I shouldn't lament that I stand out. Or lament that I don't stand out enough sometimes. Where is the balance?

Thanks.
Rap
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