so i wrote recently that i was going to a new doctor who was a "specialist" in short term cognitive therapy. i went there (over 100 miles away) in hopes that he would be the answer to my problems and give me hope and help.

but no, just like ALL the others he basically just spat out the normal spiel that all the doctors do..... identifying the erroneous thoughts and change them to alternatives. well i've heard that from about 8 differnt Ts and 3 Pdocs now and guess what, IT DOESN"T work unless they help me to come up with alternative thoughts, which NO ONE WILL DO.

I AM SO ANGRY.

he was like, you already know about this?
me: yeah, it's in EVERY self help book in the bookstore, how could i not. not to mention i've been to about 10000 doctors who all have said the same thing
him: well, i guess we're done here. you can't get better unless you figure out on you OWN how to fix your problems AND take LOTS of drugs which i'm going to call your doctor in your hometown about now so he can try to get you to take them.

what a waste. i feel like such a fool.

no doctor seems to fully understand the scope of the problem or what it is like to be afraid of your own body.

i need serious help, but i have NO idea where to get it. insurance doesn't cover this, so i can't afford to go to every single doc in town looking for an answer.

someone help me please!