Me? I realized that even though I hate not having any friends (except one, who lives in another state and who emails me regularly because it's fun for her to write to me and tell me things because I am not really in her life and it's safe for her to do that)--so even though I hate not having any friends, I also know that I'm the one who drops the ball: I get replies to emails and so on, but then, I don't answer. I think it's because these are people who were once close friends, we lost that, and now I don't trust them . . . naw . . . it's that I am defeated by the thought of all the work it takes to be a good friend. I just get tired of being dependable. Because, let's face it: I'm not. And, I get tired of being more needy than I know they're up for. (Cause, we know, don't we, that whatever anyone does, it's never enough, sooner or later...)