hamster-bamster and adam k thank you BOTH for these answers. i have told him the same as you two and, tho it's fallen on deaf ears, he asked me to post for input from others also. so as a friend i did.

while he claims to desperately want to end things with her he adds fuel to the fire by running any time she says run, so i am having nothing more to do with the situation ... as i say, i just posted this as a friend as he asked me to.

again, thank you both for your input.