I know things can seem bleak but you have to have hope things will get better. Stop trying to think into the future, I find thats damaging because you can only think in terms of right now. Im sure things will work out with you and Im sure your son will come around he is just out doing what us kids do, trying to make it on our own. (Im a major failure at this). But keep your head up purple, things will start looking up soon enough. And stop trying to figure out the future, that can only lead to depression.