Quote:
Originally Posted by mixedup_emotions
My T told me something similar, and it left me crushed. When feeling so ugly, repulsive and worthless, I would always think to myself - well, at least my husband finds me attractive and loves me.....to later learn that I was merely an object to meet his pathological needs, the realization was too much to bear. I get it. And it's excruciating.
Therapy is hard work. My T told me that it's important for me to have a good support network in place and have some stability in my life to be able to deal with trauma work. I'd imagine that would be useful for anyone dealing with any tough stuff in therapy. I'm not there yet either. 
T talked about the stages of the work we're doing and how there is a light at the end of the tunnel if I could just become unstuck. Yet, he doesn't want me moving forward with it right now because I'm not stable enough yet in my life. The work is hard. But standing still knowing that there's such hard work yet to come is hard too.
I much preferred when I was unaware and numb. |
God MUE, that must have been excruciatingly painful
I much preferred it when I was numb and unaware too, it was hurtful them but now the pain is unbearable and like t said we can't go back in time and unlearn things we can only change how we react to the knowledge.
I don't have any support in my life right now and this is why its so hard because after my relationship ended I couldn't tell anyone and kept it all inside and my ex continued to abuse me and make my life hell, sabotaging any chance of happiness I had and I didn't tell anyone what was happening because I wasn't out and neither was she and because I refused to believe that this was her, she never behaved like this before but as it turns out she was pretending to be someone for me and this hurt the most. I just wish I could take a pill and forget her and all the pain that goes along with it.