nightsky, I don't understand your T. It's like something happened to change him, to make him completely opposite of how he used to be. You did have a strong, close relationship with him. I've got to believe that for my sake too. I don't want therapy to be fake. Your T always sounded so wonderful. There was so much closeness between you that it's hard to believe it wasn't genuine. It makes me think that there are missing pieces to this puzzle. I know it will take time but you WILL heal from this pain. I just wish there was a way to make it easier for you. I do think that talking it over with another T would be wise.