You really really need to leave before he really does kill you. My ex used to say and do much of the same stuff to me, actually the similarities are pretty freaky. It will not change expcept for the fact that it will probably get much much more severe until you are seriously injured or dead.

Can you get yourself to a womens shelter. Honestly I don't think even going to family or friends is a good safe option with a man like this. I really hope you will start to think about yourself and put his issues aside now.

This is not bipolar behaviour, no medication to treat this. Even if he has some kind of disorder there are no meds to cure abuse. He has to want that and want it bad. He doesn't seem interested in getting help nor taking actual responsiblity. Everything he told you about his deceased wife I would seriously not take his word. I wonder how he treated her as well...likely the same way he is treating you.

I really hope you can find the strength and courage to leave. I have been there, I know it is not easy but for your safety it seems a must. This is a very serious situation and you can not fix him or help him.

In general it sounds like he treats you absolutely horrible. That is the cycle of abuse ..abuse your partner then be real nice and sweet for a while. They call it the honeymoon period between abuse cycles. Usually the abuse just becomes more severe each time. And that is what keeps people in it, because the abuser can be so sweet and act so careing between the cycles that it makes it extremely hard to see it for what it is. Not to mention that your own self worth and esteem becomes so beat down you literally starts to believe you need this person, when they are the last person you need.

I hope you will see it and see that you are worth so much more. Staying puts not just your physical body at stake but also your mind and spirit..your very being. I am very concerned that you sound more concerned about him than yourself at this time.