Hi ~ I'm sorry this happened. Any time a spouse cheats, it causes a great rift in the marriage.

You say you went into counseling -- are you still IN counseling? Did the counselor "teach" you two how to communicate? That's a BIGGIE in marriage. You also say that you're trying to do better in that department, but it's slow going. Evidently the counselor either didn't touch on it, or didn't do a very good job with it. You two have GOT to be able to communicate and do it openly and honestly -- or isn't SHE into it? If she's not receptive and isn't participating, then the communication can't happen. You can't talk to yourself. LOL Well, you can but someone might commit you.

If she isn't putting as much into repairing this marriage as you are, then she obviously isn't as committed to this marriage as you are. If that's the case, then what's the point? You can't do this alone. It's going to take both of you to make things right.

The fact that you haven't been a "good conversationalist" is NOT a good reason for her to cheat! So don't make excuses for her. What she did was wrong and she needs to realize that. Has she ever apologized to you? If not, that's another problem. She doesn't even realize she did something wrong! If she HAS apologized, then that's good. But again, just because you aren't a good talker is a rotten excuse for cheating.

I hope you two are still in counseling because you two STILL need it, and need to know HOW to communicate. Let's just hope your wife is open to it. I wish you the very best, my friend. Will you PLEASE keep us posted on your progress? We'd surely like to know because we care about you. God bless and take care. Hugs, Lee