JD, that is my T that has done that "not me". That is going to be a question I will have for him tomarrow. It is most likely what he means about my being in the "mourning" stage of PTSD. As he has put it, "mourning what is lost", but he is not talking about it like you are.

The problem is that my family and friends expect me to be the old me, but I am not the old me, not my fault either. It is as though my husband kind of says, "I miss the old you" and I don't know how to explain to him that I am different now and have to work at everything differently. People do not understand that, which ofcourse, as you know makes it all the more challenging.

My therapist talks about the final stage, "reintegration" where I get to the end of this stage of mourning and begin to integrate what I have learned into how to deal with things in the future. I am not going to be doing things like I used to, I suppose that is the part that can never be "cured". I am constantly seeing how the "old me" fit into family and friends in ways I can't be anymore. I guess it is as if I just know too much now, I see too much now and I am sensitive to what I used to be able to "overlook" and manage to "not stress about" in the past.

What I am trying to do is "learn" how to accept this "change" and learn how to "not stress about it so much". It is a lot of work, I have made some gains, but as you say, I can't go back. It is not something people can readily "understand" either, which ofcourse makes it harder.