Hello.

I have had a bit of anxiety tonight. My cousins and my Grandpa are over and we were eating dinner.

It's just so hard, i feel like i can read people's minds and i get flooded with messages, and sometimes it is overwhelming and i need a break. So i came up to my room for a break.

I don't know if i have a 'delusion' about reading people's minds or whether it is just a gift of mine, i hope it is just a gift. Although sometimes it leads to massive confusion- and i was hospitalised for it earlier in the year.

At those times i feel like am going crazy.

Back to the anxiety- It's really quite hard when i notice that people aren't happy, for example, if i've accidently offended them, if they're feeling nervous and laughing at jokes that they don't think are funny, even if i think they are attracted to me. I seem to know exactly what they are thinking and often it is pretty bad- they don't want to eat more cos they think they will get fat, they're confused about their sexuality, they're depressed about getting older. All this kind of stuff. I guess you can understand why i get overwhelmed .

So i was drinking a little tonight to cope with that - but we ran out of scotch and Dad wouldn't let me open another bottle (i had just had one drink), and then he reluctantly gave me some wine, but he thinks i'm an alco, but i'm not at all!