Hi Chandler...I'm really sorry to hear about the many things that you are trying to deal with. It sounds like you are stronger than you even realize in order to do so.

I lost my father in 2003 suddenly. He was 56. We had just reconciled over some issues that we'd had, but I still have a hard time forgiving him for leaving. Sometimes the good memories are the only things that keep me afloat...but crying can definitely be cathartic.

I've very glad that you decided to speak out a little bit. I'm not sure if it helped you. I'm not sure if any of our replies are helping you. Just know that someone's here to listen...