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Feb 19, 2013, 11:28 AM
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Member Since: Dec 2012
Location: California
Posts: 2,248
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paige008
Do you think that this is something that I should bring up with my T? Have those of you that have had similar situations brought it up with yours? Did they respond well or were they more defensive?
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I have. And I learned a lot. My prior therapist did not respond well (although not awful, but didn't really own her part) and it was a sign I should have paid attention to (that rel'ship eventually ended, and it wasn't pretty). My current therapist responds so well that I have a very warm feeling of deep appreciation for him, and I'm able to trust him more than before we had something to work out. And one time I brought up something he was doing that I found distracting and untherapeutic, and he was very open to it and then collaborated with me on how to change things so it worked for me. I'm still sometimes nervous to bring something up, but it's only been a few times and he is always not just gracious, but also therapeutic. He doesn't just apologize. In fact, I'm not sure if he ever utters the words "I'm sorry." But he thinks about it, and owns what he thinks he did, and won't own what he thinks is mine, but is very gentle and supportive with that.
I think bringing it up can be risky, but then I wonder what I am risking - a therapeutic relationship that I have to hide some feelings. With the former T I thought I could make that work. And it did, sort of, for several months. But it didn't last.
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