Seeking:

Having depression myself: I know from experience that your moods can bounce all over the place. He may be pointing the finger at you, he's depressed and depressed people can't think objectively, even when the solutions are right in front of their faces.

I know this for a fact: Because I myself am swimming in depression and wallowing in darkness. I can quote Scripture one hour and then hours later, be down in the dumps, sometimes minutes later. My moods are going all over the place and I'm attacking myself. This has to make me a very frustrating person to be with right now and I know that. It is a great source of stress. But my greatest fear is that my friends will grow sick of me and my depression and abandon me. If I give up, no one will help me.

This may not be objective, but it is what I believe to be "the truth" right now. If I were on an even keel, I would probably believe very strongly in my friends. I grew up in a very unstable environment, so I never was on an even keel.

YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM! Your husband can't just expect you to drop everything you hold dear to follow his dreams, or "else". Love is about compromise, learning to live with another human being, who may or may not agree with you, but who you love all the same. The problem is in your husband's head. HE'S DEPRESSED AND NOT THINKING RATIONALLY. They say one shouldn't make big decisions while depressed. THAT INCLUDES BUSINESS DECISIONS.

Another thing: speaking from personal experience, ALCOHOL DOES NOT HELP DEPRESSION, IT MAKES MATTERS WORSE, ESPECIALLY WHEN CONSUMED IN LARGE QUANTITIES. IT IS SLOW SUICIDE.

Now, even regarding what I said about abandonment a few lines back, if he starts abusing the stuff long-term or starts hurting you, or screaming at you: It is your duty to protect yourself first, irregardless of how he may beg you to stay.

You may have to leave him to save your own sanity or to protect yourself. He has to want to help himself to some degree, or at least realize there's a problem.

I'm intelligent with a POWERFUL will to survive, with a unique view on life. I may be constantly attacking myself to the exasperation of my friends and family, but I am taking the steps I need to get the help I require. Small steps it may seem to them to be sure, and they may seem insignificant to me. But for me, to even reach out at all is a revolutionary step. I'm also journaling my deepest thoughts and handing them to my psychiatrist.

Most people do not have that level of gall. Depressed people can only take small steps and fight to stay in the moment. Anything bigger is too overwealming, such as staying positive, or getting help.

Your husband may need to reach bottom before he realizes there's a problem and reaches out. He may need encouragement. Keep encouraging him to seek help. If need be, enlist the support of others, friends, collegues, family, specialists, support groups, anyone you feel you can trust to help you.

Don't sit on this too long and don't stay silent out of a sense of shame. 40% of people with depression are never treated for it and from what I hear, it is highly treatable. (I'm not going on my own beliefs here, they're faulty right now, but ask the others here if there's cause for hope. You'll be happy with the answer. I certainly like the service I've gotten here ) It is a terrible disease to suffer with needlessly. I lived with it unknown from childhood probably. You DON'T want this thing nesting in your husband's mind.
Trust me on that.
Good luck.

There is a thing more crippling than cerebral palsy: the prison of your own mind.