Nelliecat, my gut feeling is that something happened. But what and when im not sure. And repeatedly or just one time im not sure. I get triggered in a lot of different ways.

Bodd12, I could probably post a short novel on the red flags that point towards something having happened and his inappropriate boundaries. i dont know that I want to post them all out here for the world wide web to see. There are things such as nudity in front of me, inappropriate comments, a paralyzing suffocating feeling that would come over me at night when i was younger like everything was slow motion, etc etc.....just no real clear concrete memory of abuse happening where i can say "when i was 5 daddy did this to me". Thats what I want.