I've attempted self medicating with mushrooms, and it doesn't work to well....turns out psychedelics are best used when your mind is in a good place for it. I initially was just curious and wanted the experiance but then I thought maybe I could just escape all the pain and crap by tripping all the time...I ended up eating mushrooms every three days and taking other drugs quite a lot. Essentially I was curious for experiances, had some experiances my mental state and life was kinda going downhill so then I figured being f***d up on drugs would prevent me from caring or worrying about it and I'd magically 'figure something out.' Oh and I didn't exactly have much support so I didn't really have anyone to turn to. That is the part of my second year of college I failed that I've only told very few people in my family I used to be very afraid of if it ever got out to everyone......now I am not so sure I care.

I still smoke cannabis when I can, but I think that beats the overdoing it with various drugs on a regular basis, or drinking in excess on a regular basis which I've also tried. Also, it seems to mellow my symptoms and make me function better for a while.

But yeah I suppose why would you want to talk about something if no one gets it and is likely to just say ignorant things whether intentional or not that make you feel bad or are triggering. I even end up having this issue with my therapist, like sometimes it seems even she doesn't get it. I mean since I've started therapy and seen various mental health professionals within the past 6 months I get the feeling they downplay my PTSD. Like they always want to focus on the 'depression'. Yesterday even my therapist when I said maybe I'd like to find some sort of PTSD support group just had to make the point to say 'well you shouldn't nurture it too much.' well the problem is I don't get to at all and I feel like it gets treated as something that's not even real when its the main thing I struggle with.