Oh my......another tricky question.........

It's time for me to add another chapter to the book......

.........looking for answers.......

Let's begin by dissecting the question....first word "how"........hmmmmmmm....

That sounds familiar in AA literature........honesty, open-minded-ness, willingness.........

I have found, from MY experience there are at least two times during a persons life when they really listen.......or listen with intent.....the first, when they are paying ALOT of money(listening occurs) and second, when emotional pain is to the point of break (listening also occurs)..........

So, I needed to learn how to listen inbetween money and emotional pain, then I was able to "listen to learn".....Learn to listen....Listen to learn.....and the big one "consideration for others".

Honesty.....I hurt...I need relief....without drugs or alcohol......
Open mindedness.....to at least take into consideration....(or thought)
Willingness....if it worked for them....I'll give it a try
(plenty of knuckleheads in this world giving advice, it's a good time to practice the decision making skills, cuz, what works for me, may get you drunk)

Now, we dissect "relax".

The next question's that will be asked, are rhetorical. These question's I purposed to myself, and I, have found answers that work for me. It's what I consider the proper use of thought.....or.....the beginning of relaxation.

Think
Think
Think

Relax what?....The mind?....The body?....The spirit..........

Definition of RELAX

transitive verb
1
: to make less tense or rigid : slacken <relaxed his grip>
2
: to make less severe or stringent : modify <relax immigration laws>
3
: to deprive of energy, zeal, or strength of purpose
4
: to relieve from nervous tension
5
: to treat (hair) chemically in order to relax curls
intransitive verb
1
: to become lax, weak, or loose : rest
2
: to become less intense or severe <hoped the committee would relax in its opposition>
3
of a muscle or muscle fiber : to become inactive and lengthen
4
: to cast off social restraint, nervous tension, or anxiety <couldn't relax in crowds>
5
: to seek rest or recreation <relax at the seashore>
6
: to relieve constipation
7
: to attain equilibrium following the abrupt removal of some influence (as light, high temperature, or stress)
— re·lax·er noun

[url]http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/relax[/url

So, now we have a place a start. I like these two:
4
: to cast off social restraint, nervous tension, or anxiety <couldn't relax in crowds>
6
: to relieve constipation

Now the second, or number six, I practice everyday!.....I was watching big bang theory the other night and Sheldon said "my bowels move like a german train schedule"......me toooooooo....but it takes work.....a daily exercise regime on top of a healthy diet........this is a pretty crappy subject.....but in reality?.....Robin Williams once said, in The Fisher King, "nothing like a healthy bowel movement everyday"..........how true.....and I do share this kinda crap (get it) in meetings (AA).

As for the first, or number four, I practice everyday....The last thing I wanna do is stroke-out. Yes, nervous tension and anxiety promote strokes. Neck pain, and the constant feeling of being "on edge" is not good.....at least for me.....

With all this in mind, let the basics begin. I started with the word meditation in the eleventh step. I had to break that word down, or "understand" the meaning of the actual word.....to find a place to start with relaxation. I don't drink....I don't do drugs....and I don't do meds......I have PTSD and have worked through D.I.D. without ANY type of mind altering chemical....(not for weak of heart, but yes, it can be done)

In the begining, it was very simple. I prayed for awareness. The answers came.

I found a simple solution. Empty mind...relaxed body....this is were the internal peace started.....for me......think....empty mind, relaxed body....empty mind, relaxed body....over and over and over....breathe.....deep....from the abdomen...(belly)....not the chest......and I still practice this meditation today, along with a bunch of others.......

I also was doing alot of writing..................................poetry.....
.....or what I called "street rhymes and bull ****"

here are a couple of the first/second etc. stanzas of what I have written.....

up from the gutter
the man rose
two back eyes
broken nose.......................

two apples for the man
with the cardboard sign
will work for food, anytime......................

they all stood ready
at the corner of my block
there's a man over there
in his waistband
stuffed in it a glock.................................

find me, roll me, twist me
circle me into a ball
let me find my way
to the end of my finger
then flick me on the wall..............................

Over the years, things have changed, for the better as far as I am concerned. My definition and the rest of the worlds definition of relax, are two entirely different practices. I guess a person would say, that I'm backwards, but I like to think that I am special (yaa know, I rode the short bus, or the special bus in school......hehe).....it works for me..........but, for me, to work is to relax, to sit still is to work.......there's movement in stillness and quickness in slowness.............stay right now, right here, cuz if yaa put now and here together.....ya get nowhere........it's not just a job....it's an adventure!!!!!!!

I feel the real question here is "How do I relax, and stay relaxed for the rest of my life?"..........

To close this thing up, I will say, I am going to relax today by means of picking up my dogs' piles of poop. Think about it for a second..................how did you feel the last time you stepped in a pile of dog crap?