((((Astenon))))
Forgiving.
It is a word that is constantly thrown out but I do often times wonder if we all really know the true meaning of it.
Go on google and type in forgive and it pops up with many websites- one from a dictionary is
Quote:
transitive verb
1
a : to give up resentment of or claim to requital for <forgive an insult>
b : to grant relief from payment of <forgive a debt>
2
: to cease to feel resentment against (an offender) : pardon <forgive one's enemies>
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So, forgiving ourselves would include- letting go resentment against ourselves of what we did or did not do. we no longer want to have some sort of punishment for ourselves in away (at least for me that fits.)
How to go about this is hard, I am not sure if I could explain that- a lot of things with myself I have issues with. Time has helped with some of my issues as well. Also allowing myself to accept that I am human and have many flaws, and am allowed to make mistakes to learn from them has helped.
"Forgiving" ourselves, and also "guilt" that we feel ranges from SO Many Things to be honest.
So what I may write may apply more for a person with a similar past as mine, rather than a person that has had a different past than me.
One thing with past issues for myself, I do realize were not in my power of control, and part of forgiving myself includes - Forgiving myself for being so hard on me and taking on all the blame when it was not valid for me to take on that blame.
With other things that were in my control, that I feel "guilt" about- I do remind myself, to look back and see what did I learn, and to try not to make that same "mistake" twice.
I find often with myself that Forgiving myself can also come easier if I do make an effort to change something in my life- I.e. Not beating myself up when a small mistake occurs- In away Allowing to accept myself for being human and imperfect.
Or I suppose another example that I could give is - is also my past drug use, I in away have forgiven myself to a degree with that- I still at times get low on myself of how much I messed up by doing that, BUT I do remind myself I did learn a lot from taking that path, and to be cleaned up is also an accomplishment. I do remind myself that It was a way for me to "cope" at the time, even if it was not a good coping method due to other issues that had and were going on at the time.
Learning to forgive ourselves is a true powerful key in healing with a lot of things I think.
I hope someone else can hop* on and give you more than I have, I think there is much more than what I know on this topic. but just my two cents right now I guess
Many good thoughts to you.