You all have such helpful suggestions and I really do thank you. No my husband is not physically abusive, but mentally he is. For example, on Tuesday, he called me crying and threatening suicide because he was overdrawn - convinced me to transfer funds to his account.

After reading your responses, I did email the bank to ask what is involved in removing our names from each other's checking. And to satisfy tdoc, I blind copied him in on the email.

I like the idea of setting up my own account somewhere else. I'm not sure why I never thought of that, but I really appreciate the idea.