I also know this is a tough part of the year for many here in this forum. (((safe hug.))))

Woundedheart, what you are describing is being somewhat co-conscious with the other or another aspect of your personality/system. It's really a step in healing, whereas many who have NO clue what the others in their system is thinking, saying or doing. This is a stage that they must go through on their way to cooperation.

From what I hear from others this is most distressing because you feel like a fake when experiencing it, because it seems so foreign to you and not "you."
Not being in control enough to change it or stop it can also be frustrating?

Please be gentle with yourself, especially during this trying season.