Hi you may think that drinking is doing all these things for you, in reality if you didn't drink you could do all these things and probably do them better then you thought you could. Trying to be on guard and on your toes is really only distracting. Example, not referring to you in this scenario okay, but consider the drunk driver that kills someone on the road. Sometimes they are buzzed drivers,(do they think they are not capable of driving?) if you get into any kind of accident you will go to jail, even if its someone else's fault. Have you considered that maybe your not on top of things? In life there are a lot of things that are out of are control, but there are things that we can control, like doing the things we can do and doing them well. One other thing, you may think that others don't know that your buzzed or drunk, but most the time they do and you will find only problems eventually, if you continue to drink. Don't be one of those people that wake up one day scratching their head and wondering what happened, and then realizing after its to late that it was the drinking that caused it.