pm me if you want.
I understood how to be an intellectual lesbian. I knew I was attracted to women. Talking with them, playing etc. I was not so certain about the physical parts. Not that I was more certain about the physical parts with men, just that with men it did not matter to me. Kissing a man was not bad, it was just more like why? Particularly when we could be doing something fun like playing racquetball.
Frankly if the first woman I was ever with, as a freshman in college, had not just finally leaned over and kissed me, I would probably still be sitting on the couch talking. I was already emotionally closer to her than I had ever been with anyone else.
Being lesbian was not a big deal to me. I was already odd, lesbian just gave parts of my oddness a label.
The first therapist I saw was straight but saw a lot of lesbians because she was known to not be a jerk about it. This was quite awhile back and it was not usual to be accepted by therapists.