I can't tell if your issue is that it is *his* money so he is the one who "pays", instead of them, or if your issue is that one person in a partnership gets to veto an expense that the other person needs for his or her mental health. It isn't that she's spending the money on manicures or clothes, it's a health expense.

I've already explained that I believe that RB has as much right to spend money as her H does. Further, I suppose I believe that one part of a couple is "allowed" to spend money to improve his or her health without the approval of the other person. Otherwise a spouse would just line item veto any expense they don't personally believe in. But my beliefs aren't really the issue-- couples can arrange their finances in whatever way they see fit. I personally would not live in a relationship where my H felt he had the right to veto anything I wanted to spend money on, health wise or not. I'm just not big on control in marriage, I'm not interested in controlling him and he's fortunately not interested in controlling me. We give each other a wide berth for expenses. We are not rich, but we earn enough money to afford the things we want in life for the most part.