The strong attraction many of us feel toward a therapist can occur for two basic reasons: 1) transference. In certain kinds of therapy, the therapist tries to keep from revealing very much about him- or her-self to the patient, like in psychoanalysis. He/she tries to be like a "blank slate." The patient then begins to have feelings toward the therapist like he/she had toward an important person in the past (generally a parent.); 2) a sense of caring the therapist gives to the patient. Many patients have been hurt in the past or rejected and might even feel unloveable. But the therapist gives the patient "unconditional love." Being supportive, complimentary, actually like a "paid friend."

I have had a hard time leaving some therapists. What's even harder is that therapists are not supposed to have any more contact with the patient once the sessions are over, not even friendship.

What we need to do is to take what we have learned from the therapist and use it in real life--ultimately being able to find healthy relationships with "regular" people.