Hey All,

I feel like I'm slowly losing my mind in my marriage. My wife comes across as a constant victim of life. In her eyes everyone's horrible and will take advantage of her if she gives them the change. She would come across as shy, vulnerable and a day dreamer to people in social situations or sometimes comes across as arrogant. She constantly tells me how vulnerable she is and tells me things like "I must have done something bad in another life." She can never see any blame for herself in anything she does. Her view is she's a victim.

The woman I see runs on internal anger, very controlling and does things behind my back. If I question her I'm called controlling but I feel like I have to run everything I do past her for approval however I'm not allowed any input on our lives together. I find sometimes I'm sniped at until I snap back then I get told I'm a horrible piece of work, "If only people could see the real you." I feel like I have to put all the effort into our marriage and she will never meet me half way basically anything bad that happens between us is my fault so I have to do all the leg work. Never anything in return no affection, compliments or anything. I miss the clingy girl I met and I can't stand the woman who seems to have replaced her.

As for me, I used to be quite confident. In a way I still am, I find it easy to talk to people although I find I just want to talk about me. I recently started Therapy and I took my wife to meet my therapist. I recall a few things that my therapist asked "Does he cause argument for attention." My wife said yes. He also asked "would you describe him as dramatic." My with said yes. I think he's mentally ill. Then my Therapist gave a speech about how I have problems with attachment to people that's not healthy for me. Then he said that he deemed my wife's behaviour as normal.

I'm not so sure what to believe anymore. I would say that I wasn't perfect but I'm pretty sure it can't all be my fault. It's like there's a piece of glass between us that distorts the world between us. I'm fed up of being the 'aggressive' nervous wreck.