If I recognize I have romantic feelings for someone , I try not to let it get to that level. I may be able to be friends with them but it is a friendship with boundaries that prevent me from pursuing that route. I have had emotional affairs as well as physical affairs in the past ( not proud but it happened) and they can be just as devastating as a physical one...most times in my opinion even worse. Both types point to a lack of something in your current relationship and should serve as a red flag.