Sure NOT sharing could absolutely be authentic. I don't believe that authenticity requires that you be an unfiltered fool, babbling to whoever will listen about your too-tight undies, your difficulty accepting your ex-husband's new lover, or how much you want to get even with your dead relatives. There's also a meaningful difference between sharing feelings that are along the lines of "you are a terrible bore" and something that has to do with you. I don't know if this is a good example or not, but it's been something that has been in my head, in T, and in conversation with the important people in my life lately. I have different pieces of the work that I do, and I recently decided that I'm going to give up certain kinds of cases because I just don't find them as satisfying as the other pieces of what I do. And because I want to make more time for a writing project or two that I'm really invested in. It feels like a very authentic move, because my reasons for giving these cases up are because they are not those that are most central to my "calling", they are really quite peripheral. And because the only benefit to them for me is money, and as far as my own sense of authenticity goes, money is much less of an important value than doing work that I love and making a difference in what I do. So to me it is about a decision that is authentic, and there is also authenticity in the process of coming to it and discussing it with others.

I don't know if that is useful at all to you, but that is what is evoked for me. I think that while it is important to think about others' reactions to sharing what's authentic to us, we have to realize that people will sometimes be upset or unhappy about what we share and that's okay. I had thought that maybe my H would be upset that I didn't want to cultivate more of these cases because he loves money, but apparently he cares more about my happiness than he does about how much I earn. If others are upset about who we are, well, that's their problem. If others are upset because we have given them upsetting feedback about themselves, well that may or may not be our problem and it may or may not be authentic to share it. If we are deliberately cruel or insensitive because we are so wrapped up in being authentic, then that's our problem.

But in general I think that sharing is more in line with authenticity and hiding who you are except for reasons of boundaries and privacy is not.