Okay, I'm back. Thanks all.

I managed to stay in the room. A wave of empathy came over me for him regarding his choice to administer this test. There is no way he would've done it, at least not this soon, if he had any idea what would happen. Sarcastic Ellie just evaporated.

I was honest, and he gave me plenty of room to talk. He listened to me and reinforced a lot of things.

By the end of the session I could look at him again.

He told me he shredded the results of my test and they are gone. He didn't put them in a file. I really really hate the "file of all things pathological about ellie". There is no way he could have known that though.

I was so grateful I cried.

It ain't over, but it's on the way. Give the body and the soul what it needs to heal and it will do it - all on its own.

It takes a lot of courage sometimes to step up and say "my soul needs this".

Now my soul needs to rest.