Quote:
Originally Posted by adam_k
It may not be legally counted as rape but if you didn't want it to happen it probable feels just as bad, maybe worse because you blame yourself for not saying no and fighting back. Being pressured to do something you don't want isn't fair to you. I hope your bf can see that and be there for you. Some people can't emphathize with others and get angry and blame people for what they whet thru. I hope he isn't like that.
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That's exactly how it feels. I never realized there was so much grey area to this. I'm always wondering if I fought back more or said no if it wouldn't have happened. And even in the cases where I am 99.999% certain they knew from my reactions and body language that I didn't want it (even though I didn't say no) there's always that chance that maybe I'm wrong and they really didn't know.
There was a period of time where my bf did blame me for the incident I told him about (the one that wasn't rape but was still traumatizing) as well as the other incidents (rape included). But thankfully that time has passed, although it still effects our relationship from time to time. But in short he doesn't blame me anymore and is really understanding about the whole thing.