So I'm in the process of recovering from an eating disorder, and one of the things that has kept me from giving up bingeing and purging is that I am afraid if I don't have the comfort of food and 'control' in my life, my mental illness will get worse. I know it's not true, or even if it is, it will be temporary, until I can face it for what it really is, learn how to live with it, and move on. I guess right now I'm just scared that when I finally commit myself to a plan of eating that doesn't involve any of my binge or trigger foods - sometime towards the end of next month - it will trigger an episode of dissociative disorder, panic disorder/agoraphobia, OCD, depression, or borderline, which are all of my other diagnoses.

Anyone have any suggestions for dealing? Healthy ones? I was thinking maybe spend more time meditating, for sure. And spend more time nurturing my spiritual path in other ways. And I've been making sure I have professional and personal supports in place in case I do fall. I just want this to work so bad. I am willing to risk it. I am willing to do whatever it takes.