I have been on a downward spiral for several months now. I am back to cheating on my husband, back to cutting myself, dont care about anything anymore. Last night, I was very down and feeling that life wasn't worth living. I feel worthless for cheating and that I am hurting both men. Just writing this post is making me cry and shake and panic. I feel like I can't breathe and my chest hurts. I know it is a panic attack but I have never had them before. Which makes me panic even more. I just want everything to end. Everything.

I am considering going to the ER and telling them I am suicidal. But I am terrified of a few things. I am terrified of being "locked up" and I am terrified of losing my job if I am admitted. I know I need help but I don't know what to do.....where to go.....what to honestly tell someone.

Can anyone help me?? Give me some advice?? I really need help.