I am sick of being controlled by the undeveloped emotions of a freakin five year old. For some stupid reason I think that other people should value my gifts or my presence. That's some real childish passive-aggressive and stupid behavior when I know I don't do enough or say enough to express my appreciation to the people that try to help me. I act like I should be catered to all the effin time. Then I say crap like "I don't owe anyone," or "isn't what I'm doing enough for you?" or some other bull like that to pity my dumb *****. I have to control myself somehow. I get all hurt about not getting the response I want from other people when I myself know that I act like I would rather die than say a simple "thank you." What the h%&$ is wrong with me!! Seriously I think my ability to control my emotions are undeveloped and I hate myself because I can't seem to shut my mouth sometimes when I get upset, and actually think about what I say and do before I do something that I will regret. I feel like screaming and beating my head against a brick wall. Why can't I just get on with my miserable life and quite involving people in my petty drama. I suck.