Just a passing thought, but from what I understand, therapists who are properly au fait with attachment theory and incorporate it in their practice, might well be the sort who could give you that coddling without it having to be an either/or choice of approach and without it ending up blowing up in your face.

I personally would very much like a T who coddles, in every sense of the word, who was considerate of my feelings and didn't feel entitled to stomp all over them with so-called challenging questions and interpretations, and didn't feel 'ethically' obligated to deny every request and refuse every want on the grounds of my so-called 'best interests'. I get the sense it's important to you so I think you're being very wise in putting that on your list.

As others have said already though, you might be hard pushed to find someone who ticks every box on your list, but at least you know what you want and so stand a better chance of finding someone who might better suit you.

I wish you luck in your search .

Torn

p.s. bear in mind that sometimes once you've had a look out there at other possible Ts, your original T suddenly might seem much more the right one than you think at the moment. Don't burn any bridges!