I do listen to his tantrum first and there lies the problem. I listen to him first because we are working on being heard and neither of us shutting down. He throws his tantrum, spews his verbal crap and I hang my head and walk away. No use fighting w/ him. I just get tired of walking away and letting him throw his fit. It always ends the same way. Argueing w/ him, or trying to solve the issue, just ends in more hurt for me. So I choose the path of least resistance. To be quiet and let him have his words and then walk away.

I dissociate very badly. And alot of the time what he has to say is not heard. He shuts down to, but he is getting better at keeping me present and I hate it. Dissociating is where I go. I have been mentally and emotionally abused by him and it is difficult to remain present. I am prepared for more abuse, intimidation, and to be put in my place. Dissociating is my best option and I don't know what the other option is besides putting up w/ his crap. What am I supposed to do.