Blackie, again I'm sorry I didn't check on you more lately and check your posts. I don't know the details of this memory but I do know enough about what you've told me to envision just what might be the gist of it. I'm so sorry. I know you realize now that these memories have to come out to deal with them and that's the difficult truth. I know you will get through them though... you've come so far, and I'm proud of you, you can do this.

As for advice, it's a good thing to keep writing things down for your T and sharing them as you are comfortable. She'll help you find ways to cope with them as you share more with her but as for the "in the moment" thing when you're freaking, panicking, you know that I'm just a message away.. you can always call on me if you're panicking and need to and I'll try to talk you through, in lieu of the ability to call your T. Do call her. Call the help line, message me.. your friends that you know you can trust with this stuff, anything but isolate yourself ok? I'd say call me but Gosh tht would be a huge bill I know you can't afford - God why do you have to be in Australia - you dummy! jk

Anyway I'm here for you.. I wish my advice were more meaningful and helpful.

Many and much ,
~S4