No, I've had barely any treatment. In fact, I find it impossible to even get treatment at all. Once upon a time I used to believe someone would care enough to help. I eventually figured out that I am all alone in it. Now I'm realizing the only reason I want treatment isn't because I am worried about being well, but because I am trying to live up to other people's expectations.

I want treatmetn so I'm no me any more.... or I did.... because I have never been good enough for anyone. So, if I am different, maybe I will be....

But, now I'm seeing that's not going to work.... and I don't want to be different.