Hi. Please know that you're in a safe place and I'm glad you're here. My first thought is, have you talked to a doctor or mental health counselor? If not, that can seem very hard to do but such a relief when you finally do. Are you taking any meds, either prescribed or from any source? You're probably aware that there are some good meds that can help one calm down and deal with whatever is a bother. Above all don't be ashamed or let any voice tell you not to talk to someone... there's help available and you don't have to live in fear! If you know of a mental health clinic near you, hard as it can be, give them a call and make an appointment. Nothing to be ashamed about, we're all rooting for you!