Also, just thinking of murray's example of how close you sit. It took three months before I told my T that we were sitting too far apart and I felt I was talking across this big imposing distance. It's not that big, I just want to talk very quietly. If he moved further away from me it would be really distressing. Everyone needs different things from their T.

I don't think it's about winning trust either. Trust is one evolving part of a process. I think it's about feeling more or less contained.

The most therapeutic things my T has ever done are offering to move the chairs, asking if I want him to sit on the floor with me, and telling me "you don't have to do anything except show up".