Thanks for your concern and reply. I've never been in therapy even though I'm survivor of suicide. I belong to an asian country where having therapist and personal doctor is not common. I know I might need therapy but for various reasons I can't have it. I don't want to let others know what I am going through. Are there any anti-depressants that I can take without subscription? Isn't there any way to manage it on my own? Your suggestions mean a lot to me