Dear, dear Lady. I'm so very sorry you are hurting so much. Your poem brought tears to my eyes. You wrote exactly how I feel. I knew exactly how you felt by what you wrote. I so hope you will be able to stop hurting yourself. You help so many people. If you did hurt someone else, I have no doubt it was a mistake and we all make mistakes. I pray that you will be able to forgive yourself. You've had enough pain in your life. My heart goes out to you. I am here if there is anything I can do.
Annie