I can't believe that so many people are suffering from the same thing..

This last few weeks has been quite a shock.. I never heard any names for this crap, I never researched it until now.

I just call it "all or nothing" situation or extreme perfectionism.

I'm seeing a therapist on Tuesday. I'll let you know if I make any progress. I really down right now and I feel like I'll be like this for ever. At least that I can say that I've tried. At least I will be able to say that I gave the antidepressants or ssri's a shot.

I know that most people with OCD suffer this terrible way of thinking. There was this guy that came to my school with a bullet in his head. He has OCD and asked if anyone would want to talk to him after his presentation if they were suicidal. At that time, I never knew that I had a problem and despite the fact that all my friends would be looking at me asking for help, I still would have asked for help. His words were;

"I came here to tell people about my story. I drove four hours to get here and even if I have saved one life, it was worth it".

Definitely was. Just to know that there's people out there that think like this. I may or may not have OCD even though I'm 99.9% sure. I'll be finding out..

Edit: I read a bit about perfectionism and where it leads to on wikipedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfectionism_(psychology)