I am so sorry that your family--especially your mother--has decided that you are the black sheep. Alas, it happens more frequently than we'd like to believe. Evidently she is harboring anger she has developed from the past and just doesn't trust you any more. I'm sure it really does hurt when you see her making all nice with your brother and obviously showing you she values him more. She is definitely into the punishment mode.

Is there any where you can stay in the meantime, and do you have a source of income? You are 18, so legally you can be sent out on your own.

She says you are dead to her, but let's hope she's just hurt and angry and will eventually come back around if you can prove that you have changed and can stay on a straight path. Even if that were your only motive for making adjustments in your life, then it's important that you do that--for your sake, too, though. You are hurting yourself and your future as well if you go back to your harmful behavior.

You said your grandma still shows you affection. Is she able to be supportive to you, so at least you can visit? It would be nice if you could stay with her, but if you can, then please don't take advantage of her. At least earn your keep by helping her out.

Okay, I'll wait to hear what else you can add--and maybe other folks will chime in, too.