I'm new here but I just want you to know I can TOTALLY sympathize. I tried to commit suicide last February on my birthday. And I know EXACTLY what it feels like to not even want to deal with family members and/or friends because of what you did and although I cant make things physically any easier I sincerely wish you the best, you have my (and I'm sure others') fullest support. Us here dealing with depression? Yeah we need to stick together. I remember last year being on my laptop desperate because I knew I'd be moved to a psych ward and wanting support but not even knowing where to get it. (Now we all do) You will be alright. This is a curse and also a blessing. Being hospitalized sucks, no way around that but its not the end of the world. You should be out pretty quickly. It'll lend some perspective. Stay strong. Keep your head up. Try to take this as positively as possible. Best of luck