My relationship with my psychologist has gone from therapeutic to sheer boredom.

I only see him because I have to in order to get to see my psychiatrist. It's a racket to make money. If I don't see him I don't see the doc and I don't get my meds.

There's nothing left to discuss because there are a lot of things I'm afraid to tell either of them. I don't want to be locked up for how I think. I'm a law-abiding citizen but I don't think that would stop the system from doing the wrong thing. Yes, I'm paranoid.

I want to tell them about what I'm thinking and what the voices say but I can't. I'm not going to be locked up again. It's wrong.

So my sessions are topical. Once in a while we touch on something significant, but rarely.

It's hard to hold this all inside but I have to, so therapy has gone from very helpful to pointless because of the ramifications of complete disclosure.