i wish i can just forgive and forget because I feel like if I keep this up, then things will not only get worse, but also make me sad. I don't want to dwell on the past, and the only way to do that is forgive and forget. So hopefully you all support my decision. I hate to hold onto something that someone has done to me a long time ago, especially since we were just kids. I mean, every kid is guilty of at least teasing someone, either calling them poor or fat ro whatever. but sometimes people take it very seriously and now I feel like I have been doing that when everyone else was just kidding it's just that the smiles on their faces made it seem like they had all the intentions to hurt me. It only exists in my mind because I know that most of the things that i do and think are really not there. I always assume that I'm right about what people are thinking and tehy reassure me that that's not the case and I'm wondering my mind is playing tricks again so now i feel like i have to control that better and not let other people's words or facial expressions get to me. maybe what i did or how i felt triggered a paranoid state.