Chopin, as you know, we come from opposite ends of the spectrum. In the last few years, I have learned to handle hugs from female friends because one friend is very very huggy. I have actually learned to enjoy hugs from really close friends I trust. Otherwise, I have a certain amount of horror and revulsion around touch from women, and if pushed (which my sister does), I become frantic, fearful and angry and can actually become violent.

Although we're at opposite spectrum, I can tell you that I honestly think that whether you're a lesbian or bisexual or whatever, is something only you can determine, and I don't think anyone here can really help other than to support you as you try to figure it out for yourself. FWIW, I don't think your T can help you with this either, given her very conservative outlook.

Last, I have noticed with my friends and with my husband's divorce clients that it really appears that the longer you go without being physically intimate, the harder it becomes to be physically intimate. Sometimes the only answer seems to be just decide to do and do so. I have read that advice in some of the relationship articles I've looked at as well. Just something to consider and not telling you what to do.

Good luck with this.