****TRIGGER WARNING FOR SEMI-GRAPHIC SEXUAL TALK****
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Originally Posted by My kids are cool
Chopin, as you know, we come from opposite ends of the spectrum. In the last few years, I have learned to handle hugs from female friends because one friend is very very huggy. I have actually learned to enjoy hugs from really close friends I trust. Otherwise, I have a certain amount of horror and revulsion around touch from women, and if pushed (which my sister does), I become frantic, fearful and angry and can actually become violent.
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If anyone touches me that I do not know well, I tend to recoil, but I recoil more with women than with men.
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Originally Posted by My kids are cool
Although we're at opposite spectrum, I can tell you that I honestly think that whether you're a lesbian or bisexual or whatever, is something only you can determine, and I don't think anyone here can really help other than to support you as you try to figure it out for yourself. FWIW, I don't think your T can help you with this either, given her very conservative outlook.
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I know; and I don't want T to help me with it. I want her to listen without judgment when I talk about it. Only I can determine my sexuality.
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Originally Posted by My kids are cool
Last, I have noticed with my friends and with my husband's divorce clients that it really appears that the longer you go without being physically intimate, the harder it becomes to be physically intimate. Sometimes the only answer seems to be just decide to do and do so. I have read that advice in some of the relationship articles I've looked at as well. Just something to consider and not telling you what to do.
Good luck with this.
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Physical intimacy is also a practical issue for us. It is difficult for my H also. He is very heavy. He cannot be on top and I have to spread my legs open very wide when I'm on top, which becomes tiring quickly. I know there are other things we can do. Right now, I desire no one. H seems too tired to be interested. Hopefully, it's something we can manage to work through.
Thanks, I appreciate your point of view.