Yes he definetly broke boundaries and ethics. In fact i am pretty sure he may have broken the law because he took advantage of you when he was a figure of authority. And legally you are considered vulnerable. Him putting you and alters in a position to help him in a crisis of his is abusive emotionaly and mentally and the porn pic was sexually abuseive. He needs to be reported to his boss and licenseing board and possibly the police.

You don't need to do that. Make sure your PCP knows all that went on and yes you do need a new therapist. As far as you not being able to let go. Understandble. Since he promised you things. (Btw Ts don't promise clients they can grow old together.) And he suddenly left. That is going to becdifficult. The best thing for you to do is get a new T maybe with your PCPs help and journal..or podt here. Hugs. Oh and let yourself grieve and remember the good times yoo. Also come visit the Dd Forum when you get a chance