Things coming out a little at a time seem to be happening naturally. My nasty lying secret has really come to a head over the past week and looking back, I think it really leads to 'empty shell' or my lack of not feeling connected. One of the persons that found the 'truth in my lies' was extremely angry but now is calling and saying it's something we can work at and can be forgiven. I told my T all about that situation and she again just asks what 'I' think I gain out of doing that (lying). I guess (I always feel so unsure of my reasoning, like, perhaps I'm lying to myself; if that's possible) I do it to keep any from any sort of conflict or I don't want to say something that will alter anothers perception of me.

I dunno, I know it's a process to figure these things out. I just hope it happens before I hurt too many people.