After interviewing my 7th potential T yesterday, I have been giving a lot of thought as to why I am not finding anyone. Yes, there were a few jerks. There were a couple who decided they could not take me on. But a couple were nice enough; I just did not feel a connection. Why? Other than my trust being shattered, is there more? Is it possible that I'm just not ready to settle with a new T? Maybe I just need a break. What if I just took a break from therapy? I'm really tired of the search. Tired of phone calls leading to dead ends. Tired of telling my story to someone I'll never see again. Yes, I think that's it. I'm going to take a break from searching and see what happens to me without therapy. I'll still have the crises, and feel like crap and want to end it all, but none of them had any outside the session contact with their clients anyway. It seems that's the way it's going with these therapists. They're turning their careers into M-F, 9-5 kind of work, which is when I work. So when would I schedule T anyway? It feels a lot like I'm not supposed to get help. Aw, geez, I'm all over the board.